It's been another long time, eh? Well. What can I say. Things have been moving along rather smoothly lately... A bit of heartache, a bit of wine, a bit of happiness. Y'know, the usual.

Speaking of happiness, since I'm a tad too lazy at this time of the night to do a decent entry... As for something completely random, Oliver recently sent me two songs that he said reminded him of me. Yes, yes, cue the everlasting Aww's, or the inevitable gags. In any case, the songs were 'Fader' and 'Sweet Disposition' by Temper Trap. So, needless to say, that's had me smiling like an idiot for the past day or so. Gotta love that man. I thought it was rather sweet anyway, as well as the music itself. Have a go at 'em, if you wish. Sweet tunes! I've also managed to fit in some other melodies that have been taking over my playlists lately. God knows I couldn't fit all of them in there. Hah! Now, if you'll excuse me. Time to quickly receive some shut-eye before getting up early again. Been a long day!

So! I figure a lot of my entries from now on will take the form in music, or art, since I'm constantly listening to, searching for, or doing both. Plus, there's always just so much running through my, shall we say, "flamboyant" mind - that it can be difficult to sift through it all to create a proper post. Though, that doesn't mean I won't attempt to pretty often. Basically, I figure I'll just go with what comes to me, as I always seem to have been doing...

I can't think. I can't think. I can't think.

I can't think what I want.



I don't feel half as complete without something. Why am I still always thinking about this? Why? 'Cause I can't get it off of my mind. Ten months, weeks upon weeks, days upon days of thinking about the same thing. The same fantasy. The same unstable flow of annoying hope and even more annoying narcissism.

So, then I wonder, why do I refuse to give up on all of this just yet?

Aaaand... here comes the hope again.
-Sigh-.

Yes, it has been quite a while since a last real post. And so it seems, it's the end of another blissfully lazy day and night.

But, you know... I just realized that if I hadn't graduated from high school last year, next week would be the first day of school for me again. How odd and surreal is that? Well, allow me to tell you: it's extremely surreal. Even after just a few months of being "free", you find yourself looking back and wondering, like many older people, "Where did it all go?" And really, as cliche as it sounds, this summer has gone by so incredibly damn fast that I refuse to really believe that it's September. Previously, when I was still going to high school, I thought of the end of each summer break as something to emerge from -- alas, I'd come out from those sun-flooded days as a partially new person with partially new 'cooler' interests, obsessions, and goals. It definitely brings back a few memories, to say the very least. Memories that often lead me to almost miss being in high school so suddenly.

Almost.

But then I become too thankful that, according to the clock, I won't be shuffling through over-crowded hallways and sitting in a small classroom two hours from now next to a toe-headed sophomore who so nicely decides to rag the living shit out of a freshman sitting next to him. I won't be going from class to class, sitting in a desk, looking at the clock every half-hour to see if I get to go home yet. Won't be obliged to stress over homework and quizzes that make no sense in the first place. Instead, I'll be happily kicked back in my messy bed at 6 A.M., with a beer and Red Hot Chili Peppers in the boombox, day-dreaming while I watch the other teenagers gather by the bus stop outside my window -- dozing off as I go over memories even more surreal than the one I'm describing now. (Hah! Imagine that.) And after 12 years of schooling, I damn well deserve to be that way, I think. Sure, while I might not know what I'll be doing tomorrow, or even what I'll be doing with myself next year when it comes to college or jobs, I do know one thing: I don't have to tolerate an annoying alarm clock for another long while. Summer's still well alive for me. The severely late nights shall go on, as well as the small flow of early-morning beer, gigs, lazy reading, and random language-learning. And for now, I'd say it doesn't get any better than that...